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Below you'll find the many channels dedicated to what we do best. Whether it's emailing a random company about their products,
 pestering the local females,
 or ranting about almost anything you will
soon find that you're visiting this site more often than is deemed healthy for a normal human being.   

                                 Lets Go Camping

So after thumbing through a few pages of personal ads I stumbled upon this one. This girl claims to love camping and going off-roading, she probably doesn't anymore.


 Sent Date: 10/5/2009 8:04:26 PM

Hello there Samantha,

     I was just looking through your profile and noticed you like to drive off road.

I absolutely love driving off road because of the thrills it gives me down my

spine. Unfortunately, the last time I went off roading with my Geo Prizm, I

snapped the rear axle on what I thought was a bump but was really a near 30

foot drop into a hole. I was forced to camp out there for 2 days because I didn't

know how I got there in the first place. But enough about me, how are you?


 Sent Date: 10/5/2009 8:31:25 PM

     what would u like to know? how was your weekend?

Sent Date: 10/6/2009 12:35:45 AM


     Well my weekend went pretty well. My friends and I are

almost done constructing our hot air balloon so we can fly over

the Grand Canyon next spring. You'd be suprised how tedious it

is to put together a giant balloon, one false calculation could

cause a complete catastrophe; much like the time we tried to

install a small engine on my little brothers skateboard, his

ankle will never be the same again.

    I saw you like off roading so I immediately decided to

message you. Where do you usually go? I've been looking for a

new spot to test out my new truck

Sent Date: 10/6/2009 9:46:11 AM

  wow thats crazy. i havent been offroading in a long tim

anywhere we go is fun.

Sent Date: 10/6/2009 4:00:19 PM

Hey there again,

     Well that's upsetting about the off roading. I've been

wanting to go for quite some time now. Our hot air balloon is

making immense progress and might be up for a test flight this

weekend. Would you want to join? You seem like the thrill

seeking type.

Sent Date: 10/6/2009 4:08:25 PM

     haha nah im good on the ground.hahah what made you guys

want to do a hot air balloon? do you have AIM?

 Sent Date: 10/6/2009 4:22:08 PM

     Well ever since my best friend's car accident when he lost

his ability to walk he's always wanted to fly. He found out

that skydiving with a wheelchair wasn't as fun as it seems as

he forgot to buckle himself into the chair sending the chair

plummeting to the ground. So as an alternative, we got the help

of our engineering friend Billy and started to construct the

balloon. Once we're above the canyon we plan on sky diving into

it. It will prove to be an exhilarating experince.

     Yes I have AIM but I rarely use it as it kills the battery

on my phone. My laptop isnt connected to the Internet and is

solely used for writing blueprints and schematics.

Sent Date: 10/6/2009 4:24:15 PM

     wow sounds like you have a very crazy and adventurious

life going on? what u looking for on here?

Sent Date: 10/6/2009 4:49:21 PM
     What's the point of living if you can't feel an adrenaline

rush every once in a while?

    I'm looking for a mate that I can share my adventures with

as I one day dream of living off the land surrounding the Rio

Grande river. I saw your into deserts and camping so I figured

you'd be the perfect fit for the expedition. I've done some

calculations and with my current income, the earliest we can

leave is march 2011. This is best because most of the natural

predators are still hibernating until about April. Is this

something you'd be interested in? I trust the answer is yes


Sent Date: 10/6/2009 5:05:45 PM

  WTF?????? why would i go anywhere with you i dont know you

and how would i know its not for liek another year or 2. umm i

think ill let you go.

Sent Date: 10/6/2009 5:13:49 PM

     You know what your absolutely right, how silly of me to

make such elementary error. I can't beleive that I forgot that

march is the peak of scorpion season and that you must be

terrified by the venomous arthopods. We could reshedule to

July 2011, The scorpions won't be as abundant then. Is this

better for you?



For some reason she never got back to me, she's probably terrified of scorpions



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