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Below you'll find the many channels dedicated to what we do best. Whether it's emailing a random company about their products,
 pestering the local females,
 or ranting about almost anything you will
soon find that you're visiting this site more often than is deemed healthy for a normal human being.   

                          Yabba Dabba Delicious

 

 Who doesn't love Flintstone Vitamins? I used to eat these like they were candy. Little do most people know, it is actually possible to die from overdosing on Flintstone Vitamins. Imagine you're 5 years old and sitting in your kitchen when your mom amidst her busy morning routine, plops a bottle of Flintstone Vitamins next to you and asks you to take one. So you grab your favorite little tablet shaped like Dino and you chomp away. Dino tastes so good that you take another and enjoy the vitamin goodness, but you don't stop there. Since they taste so good, you devour the whole bottle. You feel fine as if you just ate a bag of your favorite candy until later on they find you dead on the school bus, killed by tiny prehistoric cartoon characters who cant seem to wipe the grin from their little maniacal faces.

 

 

 look at those evil smiles

 

 

Dear Flintstone Vitamins,
     
        Flintstone Vitamins have been keeping me strong and growing ever since I was about four years old and until recently, I've never had a complaint.

         I just flew home from a two week vacation to Johannesburg, South Africa and I have seemed to have contracted some flu-like symptoms. I feel that I am partially responsible for these ailments because I neglected to pack my bottle of vitamins. This grave oversight resulted in my body lacking the appropriate amounts of Vitamin C which subsequently debilitated my immune system. So, to counteract these adverse effects, I ingested the remainder of the bottle. I felt that finishing off the remaining tablets would provide me with the essential nutrients to fight this menacing affliction.

        Swallowing the bottle of pills at first proved to be a daunting task, but I realized that if I dilute the capsules in the milk of my Fruity Pebbles cereal, they are much easier to consume.

         Immediately after finishing my salubrious concoction, I felt better than I've ever felt before. This feeling however, reached an abrupt end when my stomach began to ache with intolerable pain. What should I do to cure this? I have run out of vitamins and I'm beginning to panic.

                                                                                In Urgency,

                                                                                      Frank

                                               

 

Dear Frank,

Thank you for taking the time to contact me regarding FLINTSTONES® Children's

Chewable Vitamin.  I was concerned to learn about your experience following the
use of this product.  We are anxious to assist you.

It is very important that we receive feedback from consumers.  Product quality

is our primary concern and comments such as yours ensure that we provide the
best possible products.

We would be interested in learning more about your experience as we do forward

this information to our Medical Affairs department.

Please contact us at
1-800-800-4793, weekdays 8:30am to 5:00pm EST to provide us
with more information.  It would be helpful if you would contact us as soon as
possible.

Thank you in advance for your assistance with this request.  We look forward to

speaking with you directly.

Sincerely,


Paul Halbach

Consumer Advisor       

 

 

Dear Paul,

                Thank you for your timely response – I admire your company’s commitment to ensuring that the health of its customers is of utmost importance.

                Unfortunately for myself, my doctor indicated that the flu-like symptoms that I’ve been experiencing is actually early onset Malaria. Being proactive in my own healthcare, I’ve completely eliminated my Fruity Pebbles/Flintstone vitamin mixture from my breakfast regiment. In lieu of my customary nutritious cereal mix, I now spend most of the day consistently munching on your soft-chew Flintstone gummies. Being that they are much gentler to eat, I’ve found that I can ingest roughly three times the amount of the original, firmer vitamins.  

                It appears that when I eat a handful at once, the chills I’ve been afflicted by seem to dissipate.  My bloodstream becomes flooded with massive amounts of Vitamin C and I immediately feel completed rejuvenated. The effects don’t last as long as I’d hope though, as it seems I cannot make it halfway down the block without feeling completely dizzy. Earlier today, I attempted to make a U-Turn at the end of my block, but instead wound up succumbing to my wooziness and crashing into a shopping cart full of aluminum soda cans. Panicked by the sudden collision, I impulsively slammed on the gas smashing into the cart a second time. After surviving a minor car accident and barely out running a pair of angry hobos, I erratically drove myself to CVS to purchase more vitamins.

                The vitamins alleviated the unsteadiness for a short while, but I can feel the room beginning to rotate. My computer screen is tilting, Where can I get stronger Flintstone vaitmins? The recurrring dizzineexs iss making it hhard totype.

 

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